Three’s Company, Too

So I told Niki that Morgan and I are going to go see Team America: World Police, and since Niki is the COOLEST ACTIVITIES DIRECTOR EVER, she just happened to have a box full of promotional Team America stuff, like Team America wristbands (awesome) and WHAT I THOUGHT were Team America matches. I’m a smoker, and for smokers, free matches are like real presents, so I was all “Yaaay! Cool!” And I grabbed a handful.

People in the office were looking at me weird, and I just assumed it was because I was being a freebee whore (and there’s no shame in that). When I got home, I opened up the “matches” and discovered that they’re actually condoms. Ah. So everyone just thought I was being a normal whore. My bad.

I was super excited about giving Morgan Team America matches, but condoms? That could be awkward, especially since we’re not going out and sexual frustration jokes are really common at The Sch*larsh*p. So I think I’ll just bring the wristbands. Unless Andy goes with us, of course, because Me + Morgan + Andy = Date.

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