My dad and I hung out yesterday, and our conversation was beyond awesome.
First, let me point out the following things:
- The blog title is from a post that Jessica left on “Who In The The What Now”.
- My dad is a Born-Again Christian, not in the crappy “in-your-face” judgmental way, but the “always nice and never talks shit” leading-by-example way.
- Even though he’s not that bad, we get into political debates all the time and I love to tease him about What Jesus Would Do.
- He’s like 4’11 and totally non-threatening, unless you refuse to clean your room or give him “that tone of voice, young lady”.
Okay – this is the best conversation I’ve ever had with my dad:
Me: I hate to say it – and I know this sounds weird coming from me – but he really needs to just put her in her place and tell her to shut the hell up.
Dad: You mean… keep her barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen? Heh.
Me: Oh my god. No.
Dad: Well, she does kind of need… to get slapped (immediately blushes).
Me: No, he needs to punch her.
Dad: Oh, I wouldn’t go tha – well, yeah.
Me: In the face!
Dad: Hee hee hee.
Me: Seriously! He needs to punch her in the face!
Dad: (flailing arms in excitement) Right in the mouth!
Me: (high-fiving him) I KNOW!
Dad: Just… you know, one punch. One good one.
(Pause)
(He’s totally asking for forgiveness in his head. I can tell)
Me: Hey Dad? Do you think Jesus is mad at us?
Dad: (giggling) Oh, we’re kidding…
Both of Us, Thinking: …kind of.
Dad: You know what, Stephie? (pulling me into a hug) I think we have a spot reserved in Heaven for having to deal with all this crap.
I love my dad more than I’ve ever loved him in whole my life. Also: I’m going to Heaven!
Secretly Stephie 
your dads awesome stef, he has cool stuff too
I am so glad you and your dad talked that out and that you posted it for me. She does deserve it! I punched Jen right in her beautiful new teeth this morning after I read it. Thanks for your great advice!