Breakdancing Bodahi

I just discovered that Lukas Haas makes music. If you don’t know who Lukas Haas is, he’s an actor. Excuse me, actorSLASHmusician. He’s probably best known for being Leonardo Dicaprio’s lanky doe-eyed best friend. His music is okay, I guess.

However, I have been in love with Lukas Haas ever since he played the little kid in Solarbabies. If you don’t know what Solarbabies is, then don’t fucking talk to me.

Solarbabies was my favorite movie when I was little. I made my mom rent this about 9,000 times.

Here is the plot description of Solarbabies. I’ve highlighted the elements of this film that I think are most worth noting:

In a future in which most water has disappeared from the Earth, we find a group of children, mostly teenagers, who are living at an orphanage run by the despotic rulers of the new Earth. The group in question plays a hockey based game on roller skates and is quite good. It has given them a unity that transcends the attempts to bring them to heel by the government. Finding an orb of special power, they find it has unusual effects on them. They escape from the orphanage (on skates) and try to cross the wasteland looking for a place they can live free as the stormtroopers search for them and the orb.

– John Vogel, imdb

So in case you were wondering, yes I have been this fucking cool my entire life. And now you know about Solarbabies, and now you can talk to me again.

I can’t believe someone posted THE ENTIRE MOVIE in 11 parts on YouTube. And I can’t believe NATHAN FROM HEROES plays Darstar. I can’t believe Lukas Haas is still so adorable and he covered a Beatles song and it wasn’t half bad. And I can’t believe I don’t have a boyfriend that I could puppy-eye into buying this for me.

~~~*~~~

My dad is in the ICU. So I know I promised everyone that I would go to karaoke tonight and be awesome, but I think it would be more awesome if I visited him and watched Lost and actually slept tonight. And it would be awesomer if you could say a prayer for him.

And it would be awesomest if you didn’t roll your eyes at that last sentence. I know that stuff bugs some of my friends, but you know what bugs me? Feeling helpless. Helpless and hopeless. I just ask because I hope it helps. Use The Secret or cross your fingers if you’d like. Toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe.

~~~*~~~

If I’m attempting to convert anybody to anything, it’s the magic of Solarbabies. Observe:

French Fried

Well, I am almost finally completely moved. My new place is sweltering, but my room is super cozy. My window looks out into the courtyard, so if it’s open I can hear noises echoing off of the bricks. I can hear the train, but softly enough that it’s soothing. My apartment makes me feel like I live in the city, but I can still walk to all of my favorite spots. I love it. I told Jason that it makes me feel like I’m in Italy. He made fun of me. This will probably happen a lot.

There is a big orange cat that lives below me, but she wanders around all over the place and mostly lounges by the staircase all day. She hangs out in all the apartments, apparently. I think she peed in our bathroom closet right before we moved in. Jason agrees with me. She is a nice fluffy cat, though. I like her.

Brad moved all of the big heavy stuff for me. Thank you very much Bradley!

I am sleepy and all of my muscles are sore. That’s pretty much all I have to say right now. Maybe next week I’ll have more exciting things to share. Hopefully.

I’ve been showing off my friends for the past week or so, so I thought I’d share one of my favorite films – RØB’s movie, brought to you by Pancake Productions.

My love Kyle plays a dual role, so keep your eye out for him. My friends from London might be able to spot a cameo by the always adorable Jaffa. You guys already know Røb from his super nice comments. Oh, and I think my cousin dated that girl who plays the waitress?

So now… for your viewing pleasure, I present:

Pour Chaque <<Non>>
(click, s’il vous plait)

That’s 20 Laps!

Okay, it’s time for a happy blog. Long and ramble-y, but happy.

This medicine I’m on still makes me want to kill myself (look how awesome I’m starting this out), but there’s a lot of stuff I’ve been working on to balance myself out. I’m genuinely happy and optimistic at the moment so I’m running with that.

Speaking of running, this morning I ran 5 miles nonstop! I’ve never been able to do that before. It’s been my goal for a long time. I’m not even hurting right now. So my next goal? Running those 5 miles in less than an hour. I am a geek.

Every night that I run, I attempt to do a chin-up at one of those wooden workout stations in the park. There’s this guy always walking his dog by me when I do this. It’s like our inside joke now. I can’t do a chin-up. So I guess that’s something else to work on.

I’m officially moving. I’m moving by the park, by that cemetery where we watch the fireworks. The new apartment has dark walls, so it doesn’t feel as sterile and lame as most apartments. The kitchen counters are avocado like my parent’s house. It feels like home. I fell in love with it instantly. I’m glad Jason likes it, too.

So yeah, I’m moving in with Jason. Aside from a possible salt overdose, there shouldn’t be any problems. He’s really funny and I think we’ll get along quite well. Now that we’ve found a place, I don’t care that he goes to the gym every day*.

Since I’ll be almost a mile away from where I currently live, walking everywhere will take an extra 10-20 minutes. So I’m going to dig out my old bike and get a tune-up. My HOT PINK bike. Jealous?

I’m been going out more, which makes me feel better about The Year of Awesome. A couple of weeks ago we went out for Ron’s birthday. I went to my very first Fish Fry in Dogtown, which is the big Irish section of the city. The Fish Fry was the place to be apparently (hipster-friendly!), and also delicious.

Jen had an incredibly visceral reaction to being around “her people”, which was cute. Also about Jen: she kicks ass at pool! Did you guys know this? We played pool after the Fish Fry, and even though the guys won, Jen was definitely MVP.

This weekend I went to The Takedown show. The guys sounded awesome and the new songs kick ass. The audience was mostly their college friends/fans as opposed to kids I went to high school with, which was wonderful. I went with Dan and that was superfun. I love Dan.

Saturday night, Josh took me to a party at his friends’ house. I like when Josh brings me around his friends… it reminds me of when I started hanging out with Jen and Ron’s people. They’re really nice and they know a lot of the same people I do, so I don’t feel completely lost. They’re brand new but still familiar, if that makes sense. Plus: funny!

The house we went to was in the city – city houses can be so unbelievably cool if you know what you’re doing. This one had a movie theater in the basement with a remote-controlled curtain, which is something I have only seen on Cribs. Our hosts had just gotten back from their honeymoon and they looked so incredibly happy. It was a lovely night.

On the ride home, Manker tried to hand me something from his car window… we pulled a 40 mph stunt on Kingshighway that probably made Josh shit his pants. Sorry, Josh. Manker is moving to Chicago soon, which is another reason why I hope I end up there in 12 months.

Oh, and Jen and Ron are so awesome. I know I write that a lot, but it’s true – friends that amazing are so rare. There are five people in my life who have never hurt me, and Jen and Ron are at the top of that list. I know that I’m not a perfect friend… I’m sure I annoy people and do unintentionally hurtful things all of the time. But everything I know about being a good friend, Jen and Ron have taught me by example. When I think about how much I love those two, I almost want to cry.

I’m trying to purge my life of toxic people, lower my expectations about others, raise expectations for myself, bitch less about stupid crap, go out more and listen more to the people I care about. You know, all of those things I vowed to do in January. I may write this exact same paragraph next month, too. Whatever it takes, my friends.

Oh, and KEVIN IS COMING HOME IN 6 WEEKS!!!!!!

Since you guys have been so patient and read all this nonsense, here’s one of my favorite friend videos – Manker’s “Christian Stand Up Comic”. I love this:

*Side story: during our apartment hunt, one of Jason’s friends stole his phone and texted me with “We should get a one bedroom”, which I thought was funny.

I Still Say He Should Live With Me …

… but Josh living with Dustin is pretty funny. Observe:

Supposedly, these are all true stories. I don’t doubt it.

Cous Cous, Boys and Abe Lincoln

I’ve been eating cous cous every day.

Every now and then, my brain will pick out some random food and that’s all I’ll want to eat for a week or two.

The first time I ate cous cous was with Brian four years ago at that house on Abbey Road. It was my second trip to London. The train in Madrid had just been bombed, TSGoC was about to move to Thailand and I was really, really scared about where my life was going.

We had walked to the grocery store earlier that evening. We talked about our relationship and our feelings and our future and other stuff that seemed important at the time. He made me dinner. I liked when he made me dinner.

The next day, I walked to the store by myself to buy the best cheese in the world (Red Leicester, which is only good in England – sort of like Guinness and Ireland). I also bought some Dr. Pepper because that’s his favorite and I liked surprising him.

When he got home, he said he was proud of me for finding the grocery store all by myself.

He was always complimenting me for doing things that were pretty simple and retarded… like I was a dog or a little kid or something.

After we broke up, I’d think about that and get pretty pissed off. I mean, at that point in my life I hadn’t been through much. I’d love to face the “challenges” of being in college and living in my parents’ basement again. I’ll admit that I was a crybaby and a worrywart, but still… not retarded. I was in grad school. Hi.

It took a while to adjust to that. I think that’s one reason why I was so upset and helpless when we broke up… because he did help me. He helped me with everything.

Lately I’ve had to deal with things that are much bigger, and I have to do that in the midst of working 9-5, not smoking, being single and being sober basically all of the time which sucks complete ass even though it’s by choice.

Right now, I would give anything to hear him say that he was proud of me again.

The other day I tried a new sleeping pill… the one that has Abe Lincoln and a beaver hanging out in the commercials.

It did NOT make me sleepy. It felt like I had eaten a bottle of ephedrine diet pills and swallowed them down with a pot of coffee.

That night was the loneliest I’ve felt in years – for a lot of reasons. And ever since that night, that feeling hasn’t really gone away. I know I talk a lot about how I love being single and how I never feel lonely, but I’m starting to think that feeling never went away at all.

(Life is so much better with a beer and a cigarette; you will never be able to convince me otherwise.)

I’m kind of glad that I’m moving even though I love my place and the reason I’m moving is bullshit. I’m mainly sad that Tony won’t be here either way. But I’m looking forward to a change of scenery. Like I’ve said before, something in my life really needs to change. I can’t deal with this feeling much longer.

I wish I had a boyfriend who would move to Chicago with me. I understand girl power and all that jazz, but I’m well aware that with enough hugs from the right boy, I could take over the world.

I would even take one hug right now. Just one. I hate to admit it, but it would probably fix everything. That’s all.

Smack That

Stephie: “Ooooooh-ooooh! Wheeeeeeee-ooooooh!”

J: Eh?

Stephie: That Gwen Stefani song is stuck in my head.

J: Which one?

Stephie: You know, the one that goes “Ooooooh-oooh! Wheeee-oooh!”

J: I don’t know if I’ve heard it. Is she singing that noise?

Stephie: No, it’s that guy.

J: Oh, that guy. Jesus. (beat) Oh wait, is that the song with Akon?

Stephie: Eeeeew! No!

J: I think it is.

Stephie: Is not!

J: Let’s google it. (clickity-clack clack) Haha.

Stephie: (gasp) No! Nooooooo! Fuck!

J: What?

Stephie: Now I have to hate that song!

J: Why?

Stephie: Because I hate Akon.

J: (singing) Raaaaaa-ciiiiist.

Stephie: Am not! Shut up! I just hate Akon.

J: Why?

Stephie: Because he’s so monotone and date-rapey. He’s like Makai Pfieiffer on OxyContin.

J: But you like that song.

Stephie: Ugh, I know. Shoot. It’s too expressive to be an Akon song. I really thought it was that guy.

J: Who is “that guy”?

Stephie: The one from the Black Eyed Peas.

J: The one who dresses like Kermit the Frog?

Stephie: Exactly!

(Beat)

Stephie: Wait. Wait! No.

J: What?

Stephie: Kermit doesn’t wear clothes.

J: Um… wow. You’re right.

Stephie: So why did I know exactly what you meant?

J: I think… I think it has something to do with his shoes?

Stephie: Kermit doesn’t have shoes either. But you’re right. It’s something about his socks. Like, you can always see Will.i.am’s socks and there’s something froggy about it.

J: That’s so weird. This is going to bother me.

(beat)

Stephie: Oh! I know who it is! Michigan J. Frog!

J: Who?

Stephie: The frog from the WB. “Hello, my baby…”.

J: Yes! That’s it!

Stephie: They killed him to make the CW all green.

J: Haha. They “wound him, ground him up on the floor.”

Stephie: Is that from an Akon song?

J: Yyyyyyup.

Stephie: Gross.

J: So why was I thinking Kermit? I knew it was one of those frogs.

Stephie: (singing) Raaaaa-ciiiiiist.

J: Hey, you’re the one who digs the Black Eyed Peas.