In My Girl, there’s this part where Vada Sultenfuss is coping with Thomas J.’s death and she stops eating all the food he was allergic to. I don’t remember if it was in the movie or just in the book version, which I owned for some reason.* But she picks tomatoes off of a sandwich and declares, “I’m allergic to tomatoes.” Thomas J. was allergic to tomatoes.
When someone breaks your heart, you cope by doing the opposite. Everything that he or she loves, you have to hate. When you see something they like, it’s sad because you want to share it with them, buy it for them or even pretend you like it out of habit (because that’s what you’re actually doing, right?). So you avoid all of those bands, movies, TV shows, etc. That’s how you cope. It’s the Reverse Thomas J.
Right now I have to avoid a lot of things that I genuinely like. I have to hate The Clash. I have to hate eggs. I have to hate trivia and I LOVE trivia. I especially have to hate tea. This is kind of annoying but I can’t help it. The Reverse Thomas J.
Luckily, the majority of things I have to avoid are things I wasn’t a fan of to begin with: baseball, poker, whiskey, Wondershozen, being a total D-Bag, etc.
I had completely forgotten about this part of it, but The Reverse Thomas J. happens to me every time. Over the course of my life I have been forced to avoid so many weird things:
- High School Hockey
- White Fish on Egg Bagels (which no one talks about in Missouri except around me)
- The Smashing Pumpkins
- Global Foods
- The left side of Des Peres movie theater
- Led Zeppelin
- Big Red chewing gum
- Anything that is tie-dyed
- Grape Gatorade
- The WWE
- Springfield, MO
- Springfield where the Simpsons live
- Historical artifacts
- Life Cereal
- All things French
- The Yankees
- Flash Gordon
- That album Michael Jackson made with E.T.
- Chef Gordon Ramsey
- Frozen candy bars
- The good parts of Illinois
- Quik Trip
- The Superbowl
And so on…
The absolute WORST was that month when Tim and I were broken up:
I had to avoid THE BEATLES.
This was in 2000 at the exact moment they released “Beatles 1” with all their greatest hits. There were TV specials and Beatles anthologies EVERYWHERE. I mean, give me a break. It was impossible.
Has this ever happened to you? Have you experienced the Reverse Thomas J.? What weird stuff have you found yourselves avoiding?
*I would watch the movie and check for myself, except not. My Girl is more painful than that movie where the baby dinosaur from The Land Before Time stepped on Fivel the mouse and Bambi’s mom right before it ate Ponyboy from The Outsiders and shot Old Yeller.