Jason’s Approval

At least twice a week, my roommate Jason and I will arrive home at the same time and share a drunk giggly recap of the night before we go to bed, or a croaky conversation about it the next morning.

He has a lot of trouble keeping track of my friends’ names, especially if he’s never met them. And I’ve only truly dated 2 boys since I’ve lived with him, but there have been several crushes, pursuitors, or one-date-wonders. And whether I am happy, angry, sad, or in love, he never has any idea who I am talking about. Unless, of course, he gives them a nickname.

You are not officially a man in my life until Jason figures out what to call you. Here are some of my favorite nicknames that Jason has thrown out over the years:

* Harvey Danger

* Revenge of the Nerd

* WrappedAroundYourFinger

* Found Guy

* Oh Yeah, Mike! – The one he set me up with and actually knows

* The Mexican – clearly not Mexican; I have no idea where this came from and neither does Jason

* “LET’S HANG” – named for an actual text the dude sent me at 3 in the morning

* Mr. Opportunity – what he’s called my ex since he got fired from Imo’s

* The, uh… [points to eyebrows]

* Straight Doogie

* Fat Paul Rudd

I love Jason. And yes, he has a nickname for Justin. No, I will not tell you which one.

To reiterate, I have NOT dated or even liked all these dudes, no matter what Frank and Ray tell you.


Filed under Lists

2 responses to “Jason’s Approval

  1. Erin

    In my head, I’ve always referred to Mr. Opportunity as “Captain Ambitious.”

  2. Nice. I still love when you said, “Who? Oh ew, the d-bag with the visor?”

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