Monthly Archives: September 2012

Interregional Besties

Y’all, Erin is moving. What is up with that BS?

Erin has only known me for a handful of years, so she might not know that when my favorite people move, I write a sappy entry about it, primarily to guilt-trip them.

I sort of discovered Erin before I met her: I was looking though Courtney’s* Myspace friends to see if I knew any of them, and I clicked through to Erin’s pictures. There was a picture of Erin and … my work BFF Veronica! These days, it’s obvious everybody knows somebody you know, but in the Friendster/Myspace era this was really fascinating to me.

I clicked through to her blog, and not only was it well-written, she was going through a break-up at the time, so I started following it religiously with voyeuristic fascination (also I hated my job and basically read blogs all day, so I was always on the lookout for new material).

One day, she blogged about how much she was dreading a camping trip she was forced to attend. I realized that it was the exact same camping trip I was dreading. Much like the way Jen and I met (we both knew Courtney, we were both nervous about the trip to London), I reached out to her and told her I was in the same boat.

And when I spotted her at, uh, The Spot, she was reading (or rather, re-reading) my favorite book of all time, Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut. And within 20 minutes, she cracked a joke about my ex-boyfriend. Erin: a keeper.

The camping trip actually turned out to be one of the best weekends of my life (and I don’t know when she decided she liked me, but it was probably when I told her that I had just hit on my ex’s half-brother).

Fast forward a year to when I was throwing a benefit concert for my dad. Our friendship had basically lived online, through IMs and comments, but then she started promoting the concert to her Facebook friends. And even though she was still a reletively new friend to me, she went around to all her co-workers and raised a bunch of money for my family. And then another year later, when my dad died, she came over and baked my mom and I the best macaroni and cheese I’ve ever had in my life. If you’re nice to me, great. If you spoil my mother, you are a friend for life. And we were. We died together in the zombie apocalypse.

Online Erin is a little different than Real Life Erin. Both are totally hilarious, talented, and a total blast. But Online Erin is tough-as-balls, likes to air grievances (about everything, and it’s awesome), and doesn’t give a shit what anyone thinks. Real Life Erin is polite, charming, and sweeter than she thinks she is. Online Erin is entertaining and I knew I would like her, but I never expected how much I would fucking love Real Life Erin. I mean, I made her a bridesmaid.

With Courtney, Erin, Graham, Dan, Kerri and Charlie all in Seattle (plus Janet in the close-enough Portland), I have no doubt that I will visit soon. At the very least, I’ll see her at the wedding. Our friendship is 80% online anyway, so it’s not like too much will change. Shit, we have been known to IM each other while sitting next to each other on the couch.

But dammit, Erin. I’m going to miss you a lot. Love you. (You’re so lucky I didn’t cry when I hugged you goodbye; I usually do that when I’m hammered.)

*Courtney is a middle school bus-buddy, McDonald’s colleague and, as I’ve already established, the Patron Saint of Life as I Know It.


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“… And Thus Was Contextually Justified In Asking His Hand In Boo-aige”

If you’re not watching Awkward Black Girl, I don’t know how to help you. It’s the best.


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So Good

There are people in your life who are going to love you for all of the wrong reasons. They will love you for the best part of your face, the best part of you naked, the best mood on your best day, the best story you ever wrote, the best outfit you ever wore.

They are going to miss the scar on the underside of your nose from the time your older brothers dared you to run across a pile of logs. They won’t know that you fell on a hidden nail just as you completed the challenge. They’ll miss the scar on your finger, too from the time you were seven and closed a swiss army knife on it. They won’t understand that these are two of only a handful of things you can remember about your childhood. They’ll notice that you have great tits, but they’ll miss that your thumb tucks into their palm when you’re walking together and that your eyes have darker circles when a migraine is coming. They won’t know you get migraines. They won’t ask where the story you wrote came from, so they’ll never know that it was true. They’ll love it because it feels real to them. They’ll miss knowing the sweatshirt full of holes that they criticized you for wearing was your dads. You might tell them some of these things along the way, but they will remember the best things instead.

They will love your good moods, your energy, your sense of humor, but miss that you never turn to them, but rather to a shower or a pillow or the back of your throat to shed tears. They won’t ever consider you strong.

When the parts that aren’t your best come out, some people will shield their eyes as if you have just forced them to look directly into the sun for hours until their irises burn. They’ll silently make you promise to never show them that again. Those things are not to be shown. Be at your best so I can love you. I would love you more if only you never show me those things.

And you do not marry those people. You do not sit and sleepily drink coffee with those people. You leave those people and you remind yourself that they missed the better parts of you.

– From Give Me A Job, Please

I’ve been thinking about those boys a lot lately, what with being engaged, being in the longest relationship of my life, and living with a significant other for the first (and hopefully only) time.

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Thrilling And/Or Appalling Confession #11

TA/OA Confession #11: I’ve skipped more than one trip to the Y this week to continue my marathon of Pretty Little Liars.

It is the stupidest show. But I’m in it for the long haul, and I’m totally gay for Spencer even though Emily is the gay PLL. I also have the hots for Ezra despite his being named “Ezra”.

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Mortified Monday #5

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